“Fresh beauty opens one’s eyes wherever it is really seen but the very abundance and completeness of the common beauty that besets our steps prevents its being absorbed and appreciated.
#Dear sun funny quotes tv#
Our two weapons are fear and surprise – and ruthless efficiency! Our three weapons are fear, and surprise, and ruthless efficiency, and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope. “Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise! Surprise and fear. Tonight on ‘Is There?’ we examine the question, ‘Is there a life after death?’ And here to discuss it are three dead people.” Mrs Kelly, who owns the flat where they live, has said that they can stay on till the end of the month.” “The BBC wishes to deny rumours that it is going into liquidation. “Have you got anything without spam?” “Well, spam, egg, sausage, and spam – that’s not got much spam in it.” I’ve had more gala luncheons than you’ve had hot dinners.” She’s worn out from meeting film stars, attending premieres, and giving gala luncheons.” Dad: “There’s nowt wrong with gala lunches lad. “This morning, shortly after 11am, comedy struck this little house on Dibley Road. “This parrot is no more! It has ceased to be! It’s expired and gone to meet its maker! This is a late parrot! It’s a stiff! Bereft of life, it rests in peace! If you hadn’t nailed it to the perch, it would be pushing up the daisies! It’s run down the curtain and joined the choir invisible! This is an ex-parrot!” “It’s only a wafer-thin mint, sir…” From the Flying Circus TV show
A sun that is the source of all our power…” It’s orbiting at ninety miles a second, so it’s reckoned. “Just remember that your standing on a planet that’s evolving, revolving at nine-hundred miles an hour. Keep warm, plenty of rest, and if you’re playing any football try and favour the other leg.” “There’s a lot of it about - probably a virus. “During the night old Perkins had his leg bitten sort of… off.” If a sperm is wasted, God gets quite irate!” “Every sperm is sacred, every sperm is great. You see, we lease this back from the company we sold it to – that way it comes under the monthly current budget and not the capital account.” “Ah, I see you have the machine that goes ‘ping!’. I’ve got no option but to sell you all for scientific experiments.” “I think it’s a bit early to start imposing roles on it, don’t you?” Well, off you go then.” “Nah, I’m only pulling your leg, it’s crucifixion really!” From The Meaning of Life
#Dear sun funny quotes free#
They said I hadn’t done anything, so I can go free and live on an island somewhere.” “Oh, that´s jolly good. “We are three wise men.” “Well, what are you doing creeping around a cow shed at two o’clock in the morning? That doesn’t sound very wise to me.” “You’re only making it worse for yourself!”
“Look, I don’t think it ought to be blasphemy, just saying ‘Jehovah’.” “He’s not the Messiah – he’s a very naughty boy.” It is a silly place.” From The Life of Brian “On second thoughts, let us not go to Camelot.
Bridgekeeper: “What… is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?” King Arthur: “What do you mean? An African or a European swallow?” Bridgekeeper: “I don’t know that. Sir Lancelot: “My name is Sir Lancelot of Camelot.”īridgekeeper: “What… is your favourite colour?”īridgekeeper: “What… is your name?” King Arthur: “It is Arthur – King of the Britons.” Bridgekeeper: “What… is your quest?” King Arthur: “To seek the Holy Grail. Sir Lancelot: “Ask me the questions, bridgekeeper. Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ‘ere the other side he see.” “One day, lad, all this will be yours.” “What, the curtains?”īridgekeeper: “Stop.
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